Go, Speedracer, Go!

• Greetings, Earthlings. And Dear Readers. I cannot believe that it is Friday already. How tired are you of hearing me say that time is passing and the seasons are changing? What will my next topic be? My need for air? I know how to keep you entertained, my friend. Try to stay awake.
  
• First of all (which is actually second, if you're not blind, but let's not quibble), today is my dear Lloyd Dobbler's birthday. This is a big one. The end of youth as he knows it. When he walked into the bathroom this morning I screamed and said, "There's a forty year old man in our bathroom!!!" I know you all now wish you had me to deal with first thing in the morning.
• We are having the family birthday dinner for Lloyd Dobbler tonight. I guess I will have to wheel his aged body to the van in a wheel chair and load him up. I've never been married to a man in his forties. I really think I'm too young for this.
• Lovely K started her dance class this week. She was so excited about it. I am very pleased with the class already. It's very laid back, the teacher is low key. I think she is really going to like it. Why did we wait so long to do this? Did I really think that a daughter of mine was going to be "into" soccer or softball.
  
• You may have noticed the Theme from A Summer Place playing on our juke box (if you haven't silenced it). I know I've been talking about Fall like it's actually here, but it's not. We've still got about a week and a half of official summer days. You still have a little time to spend in your summer place. So we might as well listen to the theme of that place while you go there.
  
• Tomorrow we have our first soccer games and wouldn't you know it--Big E and Sweet T have their first games at the same time. Ugh. I knew this would happen at some point, but the very first game?!? I mean, this is T's first game ever. But that doesn't take away from the fact that it's E's first game of the season. I want to watch them both! But they will be on different fields. So each child will get a parent, a grandparent, and a sibling. The two uncles and one aunt will have to spread themselves around how ever they see fit.
• If you are keeping score at home, you'll need to get that score card out because we have a new category. Let's call it "Number of Times Bell Has Been Pulled Over For Speeding." You'll need to change the zero in that column (after thirty-something years!!!) to a 1. Sigh. Yes, you heard me, your poor little Bell was pulled over yesterday for exceeding the speed limit. First time in my life. I am happy to report that I came away from this brush with the law without a ticket of any kind. I had all my little paperwork and I had all my babes properly strapped into their seats. I'm no rebel here. I abide by the law....except for maybe the speeding part....and I certainly don't do it intentionally. I have to say, it was a good thing that this happened. All day today I was paying attention and it seems that I may have gained a lot of weight in my right foot. It just lays so heavily on that gas pedal. I found myself setting the cruise to keep it under control. When did I become a speed demon?
• Last night I started getting out the necessary items for making banana bread (because I had three bananas that looked to be approximately the same age as my husband!) when I decided to make my banana bread more of a fall-themed banana bread. So I put some multi-colored leaves in the batter. No. I jest. No leaves in the batter. I put brown sugar and nutmeg and Craisins (which are dried cranberries, in case you didn't know). In my mind, I saw these turning out so lovely. I thought they could have been attractive. I made 12 muffins and one loaf---only if I had put the batter for the loaf in an actual loaf pan instead of trying to put it in this cool, other-shaped pan....well, then it might have been attractive too. I even put a struesel top on it. While they taste good, I am here to report that these muffins are ugly and the "loaf" is downright embarrassing. You can make a note of that on your score card too. But they did taste good. And who wants good-looking muffins that taste like dirt? That's like having beautiful children who are jerks. Which is more important?
  
• I actually remembered to wear a name tag at our home school co-op today. (Put that on the score card too, since you have it out anyway...)We are supposed to have these on at all times there, but you've met me. You are aware that I consume Diet Dr. Pepper. I can't remember what my name is half the time, let alone to once a week put a tag on telling that name to other people. But I remembered it today. And I would see people I don't know looking at it and, you know, knowing what my name is. That's the whole point of those things, isn't it? Well, they work.
  
• Before you get to thinking that Bell messes up every recipe she attempts, I would like to direct you attention to the piece of Mississippi mud that I am eating at this very moment. This stuff is so good, but it's like 897 thousand calories in every bite, I am sure. Don't even ask how many points. If you eat one of these, you can't attend a Weight Watchers meeting for six months. They're deadly. But good. Man, are they good. And I've gained seven pounds in the last two minutes eating this one piece.
• You know what I don't understand? I absolutely don't understand it when someone says "I don't like chocolate." These people are few and far between (thankfully!) but perhaps you know one too. My first thought, when I hear someone say this ridiculous line, is that perhaps they've never had chocolate. I am more than happy to make the proper introductions for them. But to have had chocolate and not like it? I just really cannot even wrap my head around that. It's like someone saying they don't use their lungs. Or that they're having their neck removed. Can these people be trusted? Are we supposed to be friends with them?
  
• So what have we learned today? I drive too fast, I eat fattening foods, and I'm married to a really old man. And my cooking can go either way.
  

I think that's enough for one day.
You are dismissed.